Sylvan's Kinda-Sorta Love Quest
by Calamity Heart
Summary: Based on one of my favorite Android tablet games: Tiny Castle! Follow the love-struck Pegasus Sylvan in the land of Dreamvale as she goes to every length to win the heart of a certain Centaur she's got her eye on! Rated T for minor suggestive adult themes! My brand of comedy is not meant for children! n n; More details inside; read and review!


**(A/N: Hello, anyone who happens to be reading! I know the Misc/Games section might seem a little like that gas station on the side of a desert road, but I just **_**had**_** to do something on Tiny Castle, one of my favorite games on my Nexus tablet! I was actually surprised there wasn't a section for Tiny Castle in the Games section!**

**For those of you that are unfamiliar with Tiny Castle, it's a real-time social game made by TinyCo., where you can hatch fantastic mythical creatures, grow food to grow your creatures, pit your grown creatures against evil monsters that try to steal your food, and breed your grown creatures to produce hybrid creatures! If you have an Android device, check it out in the Google Play Store and get addicted!**

**For those who stalk my stories, you may recall me mentioning in some that romance is one of my weakest devices as an author. When I incorporate it, it's as careful and sparing as possible, so I don't screw it up, and then it comes across as crystalline! This story isn't EXACTLY romance more than it's supposed to be (an attempt at) comedy, but I think it might be good practice for when I try to improve on romance in future stories.**

**One of my favorite creatures in Tiny Castle is the Pegasus. She's easily the most beautifully designed creatures in the entire game, next to the Wisp. While playing the game and thinking about the Pegasus and the Centaur, another funny and cool creature in the game, I had the idea for this story, which may or may not be only a few chapters long, depending on how it's received.**

**Rated T for "minor suggestive adult themes". My brand of comedy is probably not appropriate for children. xD Read at your own risk!**

**Now, without further ado, here's Sylvan's Kinda-Sorta Love Quest!)**

_Once upon a time, in the Bubblestone Woods,_

_In the tiny little kingdom of Dreamvale,_

_Little fairies played like little fairies should,_

_And big fairies delivered the mail._

_Gryphon and Phoenix took to the sky,_

_Garden Nymph and Treant the land,_

_Mermaid and Siren swam happily by,_

_In the big of it, all things were grand!_

_But the heart of Sylvan beat violently so!_

_It was true, she was nearly adult,_

_But all of her friends had all found their beaus,_

_And she had yet to find herself a colt!_

_A Pegasus maiden would rarely groan,_

_She was pure! For this, she should be proud!_

_But she longed to find love and have foals of her own_

_So, for now, she lived under a veeeeeery dark cloud…_

Almost everything was well under the skies of Dreamvale. The sun was high and bright in the afternoon sky, the Ever Apple crops were coming along nicely, and all manner of creature lived in harmony under their kind human Ruling Council. In the puffy grass hills rising behind the majestic Dreamvale Palace, the teenage Fairies and Sylphs were preparing for their monthly Whirlyball tournament. While the staging grounds were being erected like they were every month, the adjacent hill, nicknamed Thunderbutt Mountain, was alive with both the thunderous sound of hooves and the ripe distinct scent of the Centaur (Heh, get it? SCENTaur?) for which the hill was named.

In the shade of a tall maple, a Pegasus sat with her four legs folded beneath her and her two arms crossed over her chest, sulking. Her dark green eyes watched as a herd of Centaurs and Pegasi galloped past her. While still considered a filly by her peers, she was only a couple of short weeks away from her birthday and her official status as a Pegasus newmare, and she already had all the looks of one: head and tail full of leaves and long, curly brown hair done up in a ponytail of course, a soft, wide face with large pretty eyes and an ovular nose, a slender, rich olive-skinned upper human half and a powerful golden-hoofed white-coated lower equine half, as well as her bright white soft, fluffy wings.

The almost-mare watches with a glum frown as a Pegasus and her Centaur stallion separate from the galloping herd and begin to play by themselves, doing friendly headbutt contests, circling each other, and eventually falling on each other in the grass and laughing loudly. The sight made the almost-mare sigh.

"Oh hey, Sylvan." a voice calls behind the now-named almost-mare. Immediately, Sylvan snaps to attention and rises to her feet, shuffling around to look at the taller, slenderer, darker-olive-skinned mare beside the tree she'd been resting under. The newcomer's smug grin and sharp golden eyes looked down upon Sylvan almost mockingly. Sylvan frowns and squints at her.

"Hey, Daphne…" Sylvan sighs, appearing more than a little irked at talking to this particular Pegasus. "What do you want?"

Daphne laughed, a beautiful melodious giggle inherently shared by all Pegasi, though to Sylvan, it seemed to be a snickering, mocking laugh. The younger almost-mare's frown deepens as Daphne reached out a long-fingered hand and patted Sylvan on the head.

"I can't say hello to my little sister anymore?" Daphne chirps, grinning and showing off her perfectly dazzling teeth.

"It's never just hello with you." Sylvan replies. "You've always gotta do something to get under my coat. Poking me, making fun of my size-"

"You _do_ have some pretty small squeakers." Daphne interjects, reaching out and poking one of Sylvan's breasts through her wrapped top. "Squeak, squeak!"

"Quit it!" Sylvan protests, slapping her hand away. Daphne laughs again.

"Come on, filly! I'm only telling the truth!"

"They aren't squeakers!" Sylvan continues to protest. "They may not be really big honkers like yours, but they _are_ honkers, not squeakers."

Daphne doesn't look convinced. "Sylvan, look down. Can you see your front hooves?"

Sylvan blinks, then looks down and shrugs. "Yeah, why?"

"Those are squeakers." Daphne declares with a nod. "Shake your head back and forth a second."

Sylvan frowns, then does so.

"They don't wobble, honey; those are squeakers." Daphne determines again, smiling. "I had squeakers that size when I was half your age."

Sylvan doesn't say anything and turns back around, folding her legs underneath her again and sitting.

"Aw, come on." Daphne coos with a pout, sitting next to her sister. "You never get this upset when I bug you; what's really wrong?"

Sylvan is silent for a long time before answering. "Daphne, when did you first find Ruthers?"

Daphne snickers. "I didn't find Ruthers. Ruthers found me. I wasn't even looking for a mate, but he and I got to talking, and he was persistent, not to mention strong and handsome." Daphne sighs dreamily.

"That's not the question I asked…" Sylvan grumbles blandly.

"Oh! We took our first visit to the Enchanted Grove to mix our magics…" Here Daphne pauses and wiggles her eyebrows. "… a couple of weeks after I became a newfilly."

Sylvan sighs. "You mated early. Most of my friends mated early. _Every_ Pegasus I know has gone to the Enchanted Grove at least once before becoming a mare, and I'm still a maiden filly."

"Yeah, that's pretty bad…" Daphne snorts, trying and failing to hold back her snickers. Sylvan glares angrily at her sister.

"This is why I don't talk to you about my problems! You make fun of me! I want to know what's wrong with me, not feel worse about myself."

Daphne frowns. "Sis, there's nothing wrong with you, and the answer is simple: you're not attracting any Centaur mates because you're almost a newmare and you're still packing squeakers."

Daphne once again reaches out and squeezes Sylvan's nearest breast. "Squeak, squeak."

Sylvan slaps her hand away again. "If that's my problem, then there _is_ something wrong with me!"

"There's nothing wrong with squeakers!" Daphne says. "Unless… you're trying to attract a mate."

Sylvan growls and Daphne relents. "Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Do you have a colt you're looking to woo?"

Sylvan perks up, then begins to search the span of Thunderbutt Mountain, looking for someone.

"There." she says, pointing to a lone Centaur near another maple, rubbing his horns against the bark with a confounded, inquisitive expression on his face. He had a broad chest and growing facial hair, like most Centaurs his age, however, despite his physique, he still seemed to lack the powerful swagger most Centaur colts and stallions seemed to carry around them.

"…Flynn?" Daphne questions, raising an eyebrow. "He's as clueless as a Cockatrice. And twice as ugly if you ask me. I mean, look at that mustache… It's barely got any bugs in it. I've even heard some of the other mares and fillies accuse Flynn of _grooming_."

Daphne shivers, but Sylvan tilts her head. "What's wrong with grooming? Don't we groom?"

"Grooming is a Pegasus thing, honey." Daphne says, running her hand through her elegantly styled and thoroughly-washed hair. "One of the appealing aspects of a Centaur is his opposition to grooming. A groomed Centaur doesn't have that rich strong smell of sweat and dirt and nature…"

Daphne trails off, licking her lips. Sylvan snaps her fingers in front of Daphne's face and she comes back to reality with a surprised snort, flapping her wings once. "Hah? Oh. Yeah, Flynn's not right for you."

"I don't care what you think about Flynn or his smells." Sylvan says. "There's just… something about him that makes me happy inside. I don't know what it is about him, but I like him."

"You've got the hots." Daphne says. "That's alright; I'm not going to argue with you. I don't think Flynn's right for you, but you do, and you can't change the mind of a filly that's got the hots. But Flynn's not like other Centaurs. He's not looking for a filly or mare. Flynn likes to walk around and just look at trees and flowers like a Garden Nymph."

Daphne rolls her eyes and continues. "What I'm saying is, you're going to have to make him notice you, and _no_ Centaur is going to pay attention to an almost-mare with squeakers like yours."

Daphne quickly squeezes one of Sylvan's breasts again. "Squeak!" She laughs and flies away before her sister can react.

Sylvan sighs, then gets to thinking. "Hm…"

Suddenly, an idea pops into Sylvan's head and she grins, quickly taking off and flapping her powerful wings as she heads down to Dreamvale.

_An idea has come to the almost-mare's mind_

_An idea that is brilliant, very!_

_But in order to carry out her plan, she must find_

_Help from a few klutzy Fairies…_

"A what?" asks one of the local triplet Apothe-Fairies, Bubble.

"A squeaker growth spell!" Sylvan repeats excitedly, smiling at the three flying purple-skinned fairies. She had gone down to Bubble, Toil, and Trouble's Apothe-Fairy Emporium to seek out help from three of the smartest Fairies she knew when it came to magic.

The three of them, Bubble, Toil, and Trouble, look at each other with confused looks. All three adult Fairies looked exactly alike, with the same green witch's hats, magenta hair, and grassy skirts with tops made of woven vines and leaves and fluttery green wings. All three also had, much to Sylvan's chagrin, honkers.

"You know… squeak squeak?" Sylvan sighs, reluctantly poking her own breasts. "I want to make my squeakers into honkers."

"Oh!" Toil cries, slapping her tiny hand to her forehead. "You mean girly-orbs! Why didn't you just say so?"

"Sure, we can help you make your girly-orbs bigger!" Trouble says with a nod. "Why do you want to grow them?"

Sylvan scratches the back of her head. "They aren't the right size. I still have squeakers when an almost-mare my age should have honkers by now. I want them to be bigger so my sister will stop bugging me and a… certain Centaur will notice me."

The three Apothe-Fairies begin to giggle and nod. "Oh, sure! We can make them bigger, with just a little magic dust. Toil! Trouble! Get some magic dust!"

"I'll get it!" "No, I'll get it! "Me! Me! Me!" "No, me! I got it!" "No, I got- Whoops!"

Toil and Trouble fly about in a race for the collection of a vial of magic dust, arguing and fighting over it when both reach it at the same time. Trouble wins the tug-of-war, but she pulls it too hard and the vial goes flying toward Sylvan.

The glass container shatters against the Pegasus's hard noggin, and all of the magic dust in it flies over her form, seeping into her skin and under her coat. Sylvan coughs, then blinks. Bubble bites her lip.

"You ogre-heads!" Bubble scolds, bopping both of her sisters on the noggin. "Are you alright? That looked like it hurt."

"I'm fine, I'm fine." Sylvan assures, pounding her knuckles against her skull. "Pegasi and Centaurs have really hard heads."

Bubble, Toil, and Trouble sigh with relief, then huddle and converse quietly among themselves.

"How much does the partial growth spell call for?" Bubble whispers.

"A pinch…" Toil says.

"There was more than a pinch in that vial." Trouble adds. "But she's a Pegasus; they're bigger than Fairies. Maybe it won't be so bad?"

"I hope you're right…" Bubble sighs, and the three separate. "You should be fine!" she says to Sylvan. "Now, let's begin the wish spell."

The Apothe-Fairies join hands and form a fairy circle above Sylvan's head. The Pegasus remains perfectly still as the three of them begin to chant.

"_Twinkle, twinkle, magic dust,_

_In your powers do we trust,_

_Make this filly's girly-orbs_

_Bigger than they were before!"_

Sylvan's entire body flashes light blue for a moment. Then, after a couple more seconds, her squeakers start to inflate suddenly, coupled with the quick sound that's made when you start to blow up balloons. It's over as soon as it begins, and Sylvan's squeakers are almost twice as large as they were before.

"Oh, wow!" the young almost-mare cries happily. "They're honkers! And they're bigger than my sister's honkers! Thank you so much, you three! I can't _wait_ to show Daphne!"

Sylvan gallops quickly out of the building and takes to the sky. The Apothe-Fairies chuckle nervously, looking at each other.

_It worked! She has honkers! Her wish has come true!_

_With happiness, she takes to the air!_

_But in her mission to boast to her sister (and friends, too)_

_She'll find her gift is more than she can bear…_

Later that day, a small group of Pegasi circle above the kingdom town of Dreamvale, gossiping and dropping boulders down into the nearby Bubblestone Woods. Included in this gossip circle is Daphne, the current speaker.

"So, I tell her, 'Girl, there is _no_ way you're getting yourself a man with squeakers like _those_.' Right? Am I right?"

Daphne's posse, a group of three other smaller mares, nod and laugh in concurrence.

"Exactly! So, then I fly off to go see what _Ruthers_ is up to, when I see Portia wearing _the _cutest vine wristbands I've ever seen in my-"

"Hey, sis!" Sylvan's smug voice calls. A second later, the changed almost-mare joins the gossiping group. All mouths fly open, but no words come out. Daphne and her friends are too busy staring at Sylvan's new honkers. "Notice anything different?"

"You… Your…. How…" Daphne mutters. For the first time in perhaps a while, the proud Pegasus is at a loss for words.

"Let's just say I had a little growth spurt." Sylvan snickers. "Now my honkers are bigger than your honkers!"

"Hmph! I'll be the judge of that." Daphne huffs, flying up next to Sylvan. Both Pegasi turn their upper halves toward each other and press their chests together, an act tantamount to two Centaur locking horns in order to compare sizes. It doesn't take Daphne long at all to blanche in realization as she inspects and compares.

"They… they _are_ bigger…" she whispers, flying back toward her still-shocked posse.

"I _told_ you! Now I'll be sure to get Flynn's attention with these!"

At that moment, Sylvan's honkers suddenly sparkle, then inflate again, growing to about three times their original size.

"Whoa!" Sylvan cries as the extra weight causes her body to lurch forward in flight and start to descend. She uses more of her strength to level herself out and keep flying straight, but it's nearly impossible for her to fly up higher and rejoin Daphne and her friends.

"Magic!" Daphne declares. "You used magic to blow up your squeakers! I should've known! And now you're showing off by making them bigger at will!"

Daphne flies down to Sylvan's level with a cheeky pout. Sylvan, however, looks distressed.

"This isn't at will, sis!" she says. "I don't know why they grew again!"

Daphne rolls her eyes, and as she does, Sylvan's honkers sparkle and then inflate some more, now straining against her pink cloth top.

"Waaaah!" Sylvan cries as her new weight causes her to lurch forward again into a dive she cannot pull out of. No matter how hard she flaps her wings, Sylvan cannot level herself out again. Eventually, her wings lose their strength and Sylvan drops into a spiraling nosedive.

The falling almost-mare shrieks louder than she's ever shrieked before as she falls like a magic missile breasts-first toward the ground. She shuts her eyes, expecting to land hard and turn into a pancake on the grass, but is surprised to feel something grab her and change her direction, flying off to one side instead of straight down.

"Oof! Wow, you're heavy!"

Sylvan opens her eyes and gasp as she sees a large Gryphon strain to carry her across the air in his thick, powerful arms.

"Wings!" Sylvan yelps. "You saved my life!"

"That's my job." the purple-furred Gryphon grunts, stopping in the air and slowly lowering himself and Sylvan to the ground before letting her go. Wings pants for breath and Sylvan fights against the weight of her now giant bust trying to stay upright.

Wings looks at Sylvan and furls his bushy yellow brows. "Geez, Sylvan, those things are as big as your head." he comments. "I didn't know Pegasi could get that big."

"They can't!" Daphne says, flying down to the ground beside Sylvan and hugging her. "At least not without magic. Sylvan, what happened? And what were you thinking getting your squeakers blown up into bloopers?"

"Bloopers?" Wings repeats, blinking.

"Yeah." Daphne says, reaching out and poking one of Sylvan's breasts. It wobbles a little at the attention. "Bloop."

"Stop it!" Sylvan protests. "I was tired of you making fun of my chest size, so I went to the Apothe-Fairies and they used a whole lot of magic dust and cast a spell and-"

"Those bumbling stoogettes?" Wings interjects, raising an eyebrow. "They can hardly get anything right when it comes to this kind of magic. Now I'm not surprised something like this happened."

"Is that the only reason? You were too upset about me talking about your squeakers?" Daphne asks, frowning sadly.

"I… also wanted to get Flynn's attention." Sylvan says softly, blushing and looking away. Wings claps his palm to his face and Daphne laughs.

"You're not going to attract any positive attention with those." he says. "Come on, let's go back to the Apothe-Fairies and reverse this spell.

"But, but…" Sylvan starts to protest. "They aren't _that_ big, are they?"

On cue, Sylvan's bloopers sparkle again and then grow even larger, nearly ripping her top apart! The almost-mare can't handle that much weight and falls forward. Wings sighs, and he and Daphne help Sylvan up and start to drag her toward the Apothe-Fairy Emporium.

Not long after Bubble, Toil, and Trouble apologize for the botched spell and undo it, Sylvan goes back to her place underneath the tall maple on Thunderbutt Mountain, sulking once again as she watches colt or stallion Centaurs with their filly or mare Pegasus mates, sitting and watching the sun set on what is, for them, another good day… Sylvan sighs, her eyes turning down to the ground.

"Hey, are you Sylvan?" asks a Centaur's voice nearby. The almost-mare turns her head and gasps as she looks up into Flynn's eyes.

"U-Um… yeah." she says softly. "Y-You're Flynn."

The almost-stallion gives Sylvan a goofy grin as he hears his name. "Yup! That's me! I heard from some gossiping newfillies earlier that you fell out of the sky. I've never heard of a Pegasus falling out of the sky, so I wanted to see if you were okay. You okay?"

Sylvan smiles. "Yeah, I guess… The only reason I fell out of the sky was because I made my squeakers grow into bloopers and… I don't want to talk about the details."

"Huh?" Flynn asks, confused. "You made your squeakers grow? Why would you do that?"

"Because my sister Daphne says that having squeakers and not honkers at my age is pretty bad…" Sylvan turns away again. "I can't attract a mate with squeakers…"

Flynn blinks, then smiles. "There's nothing wrong with squeakers. You look fine just the way you are, Sylvan. I gotta go now. My friend Clyde is going to find little trees for us to uproot for Philip. I'll see you later!"

Flynn waves as he gallops off. Sylvan stares blankly after him, thinking about what she'd just heard. He doesn't care that she has squeakers… He said she looks… fine!

Sylvan squeals and leaps up for joy, doing a loop in the air before touching down and sitting again. She smiles and watches the sunset. There's hope yet!

_A final surprise came to Sylvan this day,_

_Flynn cares nothing for the size of her chest!_

_But the end of the road to his heart is still miles away!_

_Tomorrow… what will Sylvan think of next..?_

**(A/N: And there you have it! The first chapter to Sylvan's Kinda-Sorta Love Quest! Tell me what you think! :3 I love reviews, doesn't everyone? So if you like what you've read, go ahead and leave a nice review!**

**Thank you for reading! More to come sometime in the future! In the next installment of Sylvan's Kinda-Sorta Love Quest, Sylvan follows the phrase "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." in her quest to win Flynn's heart!**

**Goodbye, readers! I'll see you next time!)**


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